Zombie Me

charcoal zombie drawing
Zombie Me, charcoal on paper

One year for Halloween in a drawing class I took, my teacher made us draw ourselves as zombies.

Doing realistic works is not my favorite because I’m a bit of a perfectionist and when things don’t look exactly right I get a bit upset.

Thankfully, for this assignment we got to take reality and make it into something else.

I used a mirror to look at and drew the basic shapes of my face and then went to town making myself into a zombie. While probably not all of the injuries are anatomically correct, I had a lot of fun thinking up what I would make next. Skull sticking out, eye all messed up, throat exposed.

Instead of feeling forced into creating something that looked exactly like me I got to create myself in a gross, zombie way. And boy, is it gross.

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What’s in a Name?

As I mentioned in my last post, most of the time it’s really easy for me to title my paintings. I just give it a look and whatever stands out, whatever word or phrase pops into my head, becomes the title.

Sometimes, it’s a bit more difficult than that, though. Sometimes my paintings will go months without having a name. They’ll sit in a corner or be hung up on a wall, unnamed and rather sad looking until the time comes when I can finally give them a name.

There are other times when I’ll title a painting and then a few months later I’ll notice something else about it or just decide I no longer like the title and I’ll come up with a new one. Holding On To You was originally titled Looking Up and Disconnected had several previous titles, none of which expressed the meaning of the painting as well as the final title.

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Chasing the Wind

ink on paper drawing of flowers
Chasing the Wind, ink and pen on paper

While painting is my true passion in the arts, I also really like to draw.

I’ve been a doodler for as long as I can remember, so my notebooks and meeting agendas are covered in lines and swirls and flowers and boxes.

One drawing assignment I had in one of my advanced classes was to take a string dripping in ink and move it around a piece of paper. Then, when the ink had dried, I was to make it into something using a pen. I made several attempts at this assignment, but Chasing the Wind is my favorite one.

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In a Rush

chalk pastek drawing
In a Rush, chalk pastel on paper

In a way, this is a self-portrait. In a Rush.

A lot of the time this seems to be my life. Always in a rush. Trying to get too many things done. Trying to do too many things for other people. Twisting and turning, rushing. Feeling rushed even when I’m not actually doing anything that requires that feeling.

Art, and more specifically painting, often helps me to stop all the rushing. Sometimes instead of freaking out over something I’m doing I’ll choose to sit down and paint instead. It’s a way of coping, and one that I don’t use nearly often enough.

Since I’ve moved out of my parent’s home it has been difficult to get all of my stuff together. I’ve gone home several times just to get more of my stuff (and spend time with my family of course).

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Losing Faith

chalk pastel drawing
Losing Faith, chalk pastel on paper

At the time I titled this piece, it wasn’t a very personal title. I looked at my sad light-flower and decided it looked more than depressed. It looked like it was losing faith in everything. It was dull and detached and feeling devoid.

So I titled it Losing Faith to further communicate what I saw in it.

Looking at this drawing now, it’s more personal. I know a lot of people my age who are losing their faith or have lost it completely. I’ve gone through ups and downs, but overall I still believe the same things I always have.

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Peaking Disappointment

IMG_0157
Peaking Disappointment, acrylic on canvas

I’ve mentioned this in other posts, but my senior year I was required to take a course called Senior Portfolio, which involved coming up with a big idea and creating a bunch of artwork based around it. Then at the end of the year myself and the other art major seniors (there was only one) would have a Senior Art Show, showcasing our work and trying to impress people. (The art show actually worked for me because I sold my first three paintings there!)

My general idea for my senior portfolio was to paint emotions. But how to do this? Color was important. As were brush strokes and medium used.

At first, I created a bunch of “light-flowers” that expressed different emotions.

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